“Self-talk reflects your innermost feelings.” Dr. Asa Don Brown
It took me a long time to build up this muscle.
I still have moments of weakness but I am much more aware and mindful of WHY certain people, events, and comments trigger me.
When I hit my 40s my tolerance level wore extremely thin for those who wanted to use me as their emotional punching bag. Now I am in my 50s my BS and narcissist detector is finely tuned and I have tools and strategies in place to shield and protect my self-worth.
Some of my go-to tools are:
I no longer look for or rely up external validation
I am a lot more gracious and forgive myself about my past mistakes – life is a learning journey after all
It doesn’t matter what other people think of me as long as my intentions are for the greater good and are backed up with integrity and compassion
Listen real close to what I am saying to and about myself
Everybody has the right to feel worthy and valued but that ‘permission’ has to come from me first
When I was doing a little research for a client on building self-worth and self-esteem and came across a great article in Positive Psychology by Courtney E. Ackerman, MA
This article covers not only the psychology of self-worth but what defines it, how to increase self-worth in adolescents and adults, the importance of self-worth in relationships, the risks of tying your self-worth to your job, and practical activities and exercises for developing self-worth.
'Once you understand, accept, and love yourself, you will reach a point where you no longer depend on people, accomplishments, or other external factors for your self-worth.'
When I was working in learning support in a secondary school I used to have a laminated sign on my classroom door and at the end of every lesson, I would ask the students to read it out aloud and to give it a 'high-five' on their way out. The sign read 'I Am Worthy, I Am Enough' The students either smiled or shook their heads whilst giving me a smirk. This simple signage was more powerful than I could have ever imagined. It helped me on some of my darkest days and it opened the door for my students to have deeper conversations with me.
Since leaving that job and starting my own business this sign is now in the guest bathroom as a reminder to all that enter - they are worthy and they are enough.
Growth Learning: Here are some articles you may find interesting
So, what does SELF-WORTH mean to you and why is it important?
#selfcare #selfworthiseverything #empowerment #selfbelief #gratitude #nomorebullshit #selfrespect #selfesteem #positivepsychology #positiveselftalk #selfcoaching #IAmWorthyIAmEnough #joyandpurposecoaching
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